Sometimes I wish....

 Monday, August 3, 2009

Sometimes I wish….. that I stood out in a crowd a little more. Now, don’t get me wrong sometimes it is good to be able to fade into the background, but if you are ALWAYS having to reintroduce yourself to people you have met before, it can be quite troublesome. You begin to question what type, if any type of impression you are leaving on people.

I have ALWAYS had friends who are extroverted (to say the least) and I am your classic introvert so it was natural that people remembered my friends before they remembered me. I was and still am remembered as “so and so’s friend”.

I am not trying to sound all “my dog died” but, it is something that has been in the back of my mind for quite some time. But now as a mother raising a daughter I have started to naturally OVERANALYZE myself and my role in her life. I feel that raising a little girl is such a HUGE responsibility and if I/we are going to raise a confident, happy, caring, compassionate, giving, self-sufficient young woman then I am going to HAVE to be the role model she needs. So in my search to be the “perfect” role model I am discovering all kinds of stuff about myself that I wish I could change or alter just a little bit.

But on the positive side I am also discovering many wonderful qualities that I LIKE about being me and hope that Tay will posses as well. But why is it that the bad seems to out weigh the good?
Oh, that’s right; I am a glass half-empty kinda girl.
Man another thing I need to alter or tweak. *sigh*

Who knew that all this kid raising stuff was going to be so difficult ;)?
Next Time: The good stuff

Thanks for caring,
K

5 comments:

Molly August 3, 2009 at 5:31 PM  

Kelly! We all have things about us that we want to change. I see things already in Cooper and I think "great...got that from me already"! The beauty of motherhood, (at our kids age, at least) is that they only see the good. They think we are the most perfect people in the world! I know I will NEVER be perfect, but you do your best, you be you, and you will raise an amazing daughter!
Oh, and I love you and your blog. You stand out to me!

Heather August 4, 2009 at 8:41 AM  

I usually hang around people more extroverted than myself, too - but I've been learning (over the past three or four years) to be more outgoing. Sometimes its uncomfortable, but once you make that first step, it gets easier.

Good luck - and just know that you don't have to change to be a good role model for Tay. You already seem pretty great :)

Anonymous,  August 4, 2009 at 10:10 AM  

Kelly, everyone has that something about themselves they wish they could change but we have to remember that we are who we are because of these attributes.. If you continue to show love patience and support I know that your daughter will become the confident strong women you want her to be. What you may not realize is that is what you are as well. Remember always that while you may look at it as a fault others look at is a quality of yours. And always remember you'll be loved no matter what.....sa

Momma Chae August 4, 2009 at 10:12 PM  

I hear ya! I was painfully shy as a little kid. I didn't really open up until high school - and then I was a crazy person to make up for all the quiet years. :) So, I've made sure to show my kids how to dance in public, be silly and spontaneous, and I've tried to pour on the compliments so that my kids will never feel as self conscious as I always did. (it's really exhausting being a mom.)

Summer August 7, 2009 at 11:45 AM  

Kids are amazing...but seriously, they take soooo much out of you.

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